I Still Trust You
by mishka-chan
Summary: Dedication Fic! For fiveshadesoforange. Naruto has become Hokage, but under one term of his own, Sasuke has to be by his side. Good thing for Jounin ANBU Sasuke, there is no where else he would rather be. Sasunaru. Lemon later on.
1. I Still Trust You

Hey guys! Sorry I was gone so long, but my daddy (love you papa!) when I told him that I wished I had my computer he went out and bought one for me and put internet with it! It made me so happy! Well for those who are waiting on SAFTA chapter 7 I am working on it! I promise! This story was a request from a very lovely reviewer of mine! From one of my favorite reviewers I simply know as "fiveshadesoforange" So thanks to you lovely reviewer! This fic is for you!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto! I do however own the lovely laptop that daddy got for me! "Thank you Papa Russell!"

Warning: There won't be much smut in this... I was requested to make a sweet story and this is my attempt at it! There will be a lemon later on in the story however... -does a dance- and none of you can stop me! Don't report me for abuse! I AM BEGGING YOU!!!! Oh, and sorry to everyone but this story is not beta-ed I haven't even downloaded Office XP onto my computer yet, so ignore grammar and spelling mistakes!!!

I Still Trust You

By: Mishka-chan

Naruto parted from the swarming crowds of congratulatory citizens and comrades, and strode away from the gathering and out toward the bridge. He knew he was here, he had to be.

"Congratulations," called a deep voice.

"Sasuke!" Naruto called turning around. "I thought you hadn't come." he mumbled, blue eyes looking up apologetically.

"Of course I came, I promised you that if you ever became Hokage I would come to the inaugural party," here there was a pregnant pause "here I am."

"Sasuke," Naruto called softly. "Thank you. I know you didn't want to come."

"No, I wanted to come for you." Naruto smiled.

"Hokage-sama," a ANBU called.

"Sasuke, how have you been?"

"Hokage-sama, your speech."

"Naruto, I think your flock is waiting."

"Huh," he turned and looked at the ANBU. "You were calling for me?"

"Hai, Hokage-sama."

"Seems the Hokage is denser than most genin..." Sasuke smirked.

"AH! Shut up Sasuke-teme!"

"Go give your speech, dobe." Naruto scowled, and then smiled brightly.

Naruto gulped and strode up the stairs to Hokage tower. Turning toward Sasuke he asked, "accompany me?"

Sasuke sighed and pushed himself off the railing heading toward the top of the stairs where Naruto stood. "Give me your courage, Sasuke." Naruto asked before stepping toward the railing at the top suddenly all of the chattering stopped.

"Hey guys, I don't have a speech, but I suppose that is to be expected of me. I am sure every single one of you have heard me screaming about being Hokage since I could speak, so you already know about all I feel about this position. I hope you know I love this village, and the people in it. I do, and I know that my love for you, my precious people, has driven me to become stronger in my hopes to protect you. Sandaime-sama was one of my greatest inspriations in this and like Yondaime-sama, I had always hoped to be a hero to you. I do however realize that I am of better use to you alive than dead... so I will try my hardest to stay alive, while managing to eliminate any threat to you. This is also I suppose why I have to choose a guard. So this brings me to the climax of this speech. I refuse to be Hokage, unless, of course Uchiha Sasuke is by my side. I can not trust anyone more than I trust him, and so I digress. Will you accept Sasuke-teme?"

"First of all you don't call people 'teme' right after you appoint them as your protector, you never know what might happen in your sleep, and second of all, there is no one I wish to protect more Hokage-sama." Sasuke kneeled before him.

"Thank you, Sasuke." Naruto reached down with his hand to help Sasuke up. On which Sasuke pulled.

Right at that time eight shuriken flew right where Naruto had been. "Wow, you take your job seriously." Chuckled to hide his surprise.

"Let me take care of this scum."

"Have at it, Sasuke."

"Is that an order?"

"Of course." Sasuke leapt from the tower and flipped several times over and landed gracefully on the ground.

"Teme, don't you dare get killed."

"You never have to worry about that, dobe." In a split second, Sasuke's swords were drawn and he was running in the direction that the trajectory of the shuriken had implied. In one slice the perpertrator was felled.

"I am going to leave you alive." Sasuke murmured. "but don't get excited. You are living for torture."

"Someone take this trash to Ibiki." Sasuke said and jumped back and focusing the chakra in his feet and legs he leaped up the Hokage tower to Naruto's side. "Thank god your safe, Naruto-kun." Sasuke whispered.

"Keep appearances up." Tsunade whispered beside him.

"Someone didn't want me." Naruto whispered. "Someone didn't want me to protect them."

"There are always fools, Naruto." Sasuke whispered again.

"Yeah me," Naruto said. "Sasuke, haven't I tried hard enough? To please them, haven't I?"

"You've done more than enough, Naruto. Come on, let's get to work. You've had a long day, an hour

or two should do it. Then we'll go home."

"Yeah, okay..."

"I'll treat you to ramen..."

"Mmm, sounds good."

They turned and entered the Hokage office. Naruto sat in his chair and sighed.

Suddenly a poof annouced the arrival of Naruto's former sensei, Hatake Kakashi. "Yo,"

"You're late!" Naruto screamed and then paused. "Wait, no you aren't."

"Hokage-sama, the council wishes to see you. As does Jaraiya, who wishes to accompany you."

"Call me Naruto, it's weird to hear you call me Hokage-sama. Let's go Sasuke."

"Hai, Hokage-sama." Naruto stood and followed Kakashi to Jaraiya's side, Sasuke tagging along just behind Naruto.

Naruto busted through the front doors of the councilroom.

"You wanted to speak to me?" Naruto said. Sasuke could see every councilman in the room stiffen at Naruto's presence.

"Good Afternoon, Rokudaime. You do understand that our choice to make you, the vessal for Kyuubi no Kitsune, our Hokage was a difficult step for us. However, due to the resistence during your inauguration we may have to impeach you."

"You can't do that!" Sasuke shouted.

"Quiet, Uchiha Sasuke."

"He's right, you can't do that, you don't have the power. The Hokage is under the jurisdiction of the ninja society. The most powerful ninja in the land. The only thing you can do is hire ninja to attempt to bring my downfall or possibly hold a tournament with those within the village. You cannot take my title away from me after the inauguration. In other words, you are trying to scare me into quitting."

"You want the best for the people of Konoha, correct? Quite a few have spoken and said that they did not trust you as a Hokage, they would rather have your teammate, Haruno Sakura, in that position."

"That is not what the people want! That is what you want, someone you think you can control. As for their trust, whether or not they know it, or acknowledge it, I am the best for them. Therefore I will not resign, simply because I have my demons, we all have demons it is just mine is village wide knowledge."

"It's not that they don't trust the beast, they don't trust you! It's you they don't trust." For a second Sasuke saw the tough facade Naruto kept up slip and then grow hard.

"I still trust you." Sasuke whispered.

"As do I," Kakashi acknowledged.

"And I," Jaraiya spoke.

"I WILL NOT RESIGN!"

"Well then one other problem we have."

"What is it?"

"Your nomination of Uchiha Sasuke, we doubt the wisdom of it."

"State your reasons."

"His betrayal of Konoha, his betrayal of you."

"He was twelve, confused, and brainwashed."

"He tried to kill you."

"He didn't, though."

"If you did not have the regenative powers of the Kyuubi, you would be dead."

"He could've killed me, but he didn't."

"He could still harbor ill will for you."

"Believe me if he did, I would be dead. That is all I am saying, Sasuke is the only one I would trust with my life. I am sorry to say that I would not trust any of you not even out of battle. Of all of my shinobi, he is not the only I would trust in battle, but he is the only I would trust if I was wounded and needed to be protected, to do so, and also take down my enemy. I would want Sasuke by my side constantly. Even though he has done some really stupid things, and made some really bad choices, I still trust him. I hate to say it, but I trust him more than Sakura-chan, Kakashi-sensei, and Ero-sennin."

"I still trust you, Sasuke."

"Thank you, Naruto-kun." Sasuke whispered.

A/N: Wow, I will do better next time. I hope... this is a chapter story! I THANK YOU "FIVESHADESOFORANGE"


	2. I Still Cry On You

I Still Trust You

Chapter Two: I Still Cry On You

A/N: This chapter hit me in my sleep... I hope it is to your liking. Especially to yours "fiveshadesoforange" and "Alley-Oop" Both to really beloved reviewers of mine. AND OF COURSE, this story is written in the honor of "fiveshadesoforange."

Warning: Okay you are reading it, so you must be okay with boy x boy

"Naruto!" Sakura screamed as she whapped Naruto over the head with her "FIST OF FURY!"

"Ne, Sakura-chan, I really did mean to get that work done. I was just so busy -"

"Not doing your job..." She seethed.

"Hey, by the way, Sakura-chan, you look great today... did you get your hair trimmed? Oh, and your make-up, a tid-bit different?"

"Why, thank you for noticing," She replied blushing. She knew she was being duped, but it was Naruto. He was now the Hokage, and in recent years he had gotten _**much **_more attractive, he rivaled Sasuke-kun now. Though she wouldn't touch Sasuke with a twenty-foot pole ever since his defection. Actually, Naruto was the only one who would have anything to do with him. It was like Sasuke and Naruto had switched places.

"As a matter of fact, Sakura-chan, if I didn't know better," Naruto said standing from his desk and coming around to where Sakura was standing. He sat on the edge of the desk and reach over running his fingers through Sakura's hair, leaning in close to her ear, he whispered, "I would say you dressed up for me." His voice dropped several decibels and came out husky. It felt almost as if, his voice had turned into fingers and caressed her body, she shivered.

Her face turned so red, it rivaled Gaara's hair for the deeper shade. He ran his thumb over her cheek. "I'm going to go get lunch." He said in that same tone. She shivered and nodded. He stood drawing away from her. "Bye, Sakura-chan. Come on, Sasuke." He yelled and dashed out of the door.

Sakura didn't know which was more embarrassing the fact that she had been duped or her body's reaction to just his voice. She sighed deeply, and turned to see Naruto and Sasuke dash out of the front entrance of the building.

--;--

"It wasn't very nice." Sasuke said to Naruto over ramen.

"Huh?" Naruto said, turning toward his best friend, wondering what he meant.

"What you did to Sakura." Naruto huffed, snorting air out of his nose.

"She used to do the same to me." He rebuked, with obvious hypocritical insight.

"Naruto, you know you don't like to do such things to Sakura. You should have just done your work."

"Fine, pack me up some ramen and I will go finish it." Naruto turned and used the "body-flicker" technique to make it to the Hokage's office. He sat and signed the papers, grumbling the whole time.

"Stupid Sasuke-teme, when did he turn into my conscience." Though, he had to admit, he didn't mind Sasuke rebuking him for his mis-behaving. He didn't mind anything Sasuke did. He knew the reason behind it, but if he thought about it he would only end up depressed. He was alone though, and he needed to let the depression out sometimes, if he didn't then it would build up until he didn't want to do anything. He heaved a deep sigh and began about his work.

--;--

Sasuke picked up the container of ramen and the things he had picked up from his house, and trooped out of the front door. His mind turned to his destination and the person there waiting for him. He felt a little well of anticipation bubble up in his stomach and he squashed it before he could get too excited. Stupid feelings, stupid Naruto encouraging his stupid feelings, Stupid Sakura letting Naruto hit on her like that. He climbed the steps up to the top of the Hokage tower where Naruto waited for his arrival. He slipped in through the window and into the room Naruto sat over his paperwork working hard as possible. Sasuke stood there waiting for Naruto to notice him. "Ueee." he heard the soft sob come up from Naruto's chest. Narutos pen dropped, and his hand came up to his eyes, Sasuke sat the ramen and his stuff on the ground, he took careful steps forward, and then called "Naruto," softly. Naruto turned and gasped, wiping at his eyes.

"S-Sasuke..." Naruto said, stuttering out Sasuke's name in obvious nervousness. Sasuke continued to come closer until he stumbled foward and pulled the other into his arms.

"Naruto, it is okay to cry. I'll let you cry on me. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just started to think about things, and... and."

"Shh, just cry. It's what you need right now."

"Ueeeee..." Naruto sobbed out. "Sasuke, I'm sorry. Even after all these years, I still cry on you."

"Shh, you don't need to apologize. It's okay..."

"It's so stupid! I'm so stupid! To think that I was special to you. To think maybe you just..." He choked out another sob.

"You're not stupid, Naruto. You are special to me... what are you talking about?" Sasuke said stroking the top of his head.

"I am, I'm so stupid, because even after all these years I'm still in love with you!"

A/N: SO What do you think!!!! I did it another chapter in the lovely fic I have dedicated to the most beloved "fiveshadesoforange." THANK YOU SO MUCH "fiveshadesoforange."!!!!! Inspiration hit me for this while I was jammin' to Red Hot Chilipeppers and in ... the Garbage Dump... inspiration comes from everywhere! Now I must go home and post this lovely fic!!! I hope it is better this time! Review and let me know!


	3. I Still Love You

I Still Trust You

Chapter 3: I Still Love You/ I Still Fear For You

By: Mishka-chan

A/N: This chapter is almost like a double whammy- like two in one deal! I would like to thank Na-chan (You know who you are) for hunting down all of the Russian versions of t.A.T.u. songs and mailing them to me on a CD! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! It gave me inspiration for this story, that and driving around in the Blue Ridge Mountains for five hours. I would also like to thank 'fiveshadesoforange' to whom this story is dedicated! Also all of my reviewers if you left a return address you should have gotten a thank you from me, but once again THANK YOU!!!

Warning: a horrible amount of suspence! OOC

--;--

_"I am; I am so stupid, because even after all these years I am still in love with you!" _

_--;--_

Sasuke sat stupified as Naruto continued to sob.

"What did you just say?" Naruto flinched and Sasuke realized that his voice must have been gruff. So he softened it slightly. "What did you say, Naruto?"

"I said I am still in love with you... I understand if you are angry. I really do, but I am. Do you want to revoke your vow of protection now?" Naruto rambled as if to fill the silence with meaningless chatter. The chatter, however, did nothing to lift the stigma that followed such heavy, weighted words.

"Naruto, if you love me, as you say you do, then what would you do if I asked you to stay by my side?" Sasuke asked hesitantly; as if afraid of the answer.

"I would, but I promise I wouldn't touch you or anything. I would make sure that it was as if--" and here Naruto choked on his words, "as if I had never loved you at all."

"Well, we can't have that." Sasuke said slowly. "How about we amend that statement? I ask you to stay by my side and you-"

"Would, but--"

"No, 'but's about it. You would and that is all."

"But, I wouldn't, I swear! I would try my best to make you feel comfortable with that arrangement." Naruto pleaded. As long as he could stay by Sasuke's side... then it would be okay... It would be okay.

"The thing is that I would be more comfortable with the situation of you being in love with me than even our previous arrangement." Sasuke said pulling Naruto closer, and steadily wheeling him into his arms.

"What does that mean?" Naruto asked; confused and angry. It seemed that Sasuke was implying that he would rather be without Naruto at all.

"That I'm in love with you, have been for a while." Naruto looked at Sasuke as if he had grown another head. "Does 'still being in love with you' make me stupid, Naruto."

"Ne, Sasuke, Do you mean it? If you are messing with my head, I will never forgive you!" Naruto said attempting to pull away from Sasuke.

"I don't have the humor to play tricks on you of any kind." Sasuke said dryly. Naruto approached Sasuke slowly.

--;--

"Well, the probability of success jumps up with Kakashi heading the team." A lazy drawl stuttered the silence that had engulfed the two men for the last few seconds.

"Of course, he has always been the best ANBU captain." Another lighter, louder voice replied.

"Who do you propose go with him?" The lazy one drawled out slowly, while a genius, his companion knew a lot more about high-stakes battling.

"We need a team of three." His companion murmured. "What with the dynamics of teamwork; three has always been a balanced number."

"Hokage? May I ask a question..." He asked almost hesitantly, then again he was too lazy to ask hesitantly; he was probably just taking a break.

"Of course, Shikamaru!" Naruto practically beamed.

"Why has Sasuke started staying with you so much?" Shikamaru asked, knowing the answer, but come on messing with Naruto was both easy and fun. Naruto sputtered and blushed.

"Well, you see Sasuke and I..." Naruto said after he finally got himself together.

"Ah, drop it too troublesome! Back to the mission." Shikamaru muttered; what about Naruto wasn't troublesome; troublesome, but loveable?

"Who do we have?"Naruto said; suddenly so grim and serious that it shocked Shikamaru, hell, it stilll shocked him that Naruto could be Hokage.

"Chouji- goes down... he is a great ninja, but he is stronger in brute stregth, but for recon and assassanation- he is better left off! We need someone with a great amount of techniques and silent!" Shikamaru exclaimed, or about as close to exclaiming as you would get from Shikamaru.

"Neji, great for recon!" Naruto automatically annouced.

"Okay, 360 vision, okay it went up." Shikamaru weighed.

"One more." Naruto pondered.

"The rest of the available ninja will all bring it down." Shikamaru said after working all the possible combonations.

"What is the average with them?" Naruto asked nervously.

"42 percent." Naruto bit his nails.

"There is one who brings it up to 53 percent and with all of the combos he is the only one that goes over 50 percentile." Shikamaru continued. Naruto put his face in his hands.

"Who?" Naruto asked, wondering who could jump it up so much.

"Uchiha." The reaction was immediate he blanched, and seemed to deflate.

"No! I refuse to do it, 53 is not enough for me to risk his life." Naruto murmured to himself. "He is my guard he can't leave!"

"You are being selfish,Hokage-sama," said a voice from behind Naruto. It was a voice Naruto instantly recongnized.

"Sasuke..." Naruto almost moaned. Not from pleasure, but from dread. He wouldn't be able to change the line-up now.

"Shikamaru, you will take my position as Hokage-sama's guard in my absence, correct?" Sasuke said, grasping the attention of the lazy man, generally a hard task.

"Yes." Shikamaru answered, slowly becoming interested in the happences in front of him.

"Sign me up." Sasuke said simply. He heard Naruto choke from behind his hand. Shikamaru knew his heart was breaking behind his hand.

"I'll go take the mission description and roster to the front desk." Naruto's hands slid from his face. Shikamaru saw the raw pain Naruto's eyes. He couldn't imagine being the one who had to send his loved one on a suicide mission, 50 percent chance of dying. Their were good ninja's that died on mission with a one percent chance of death. It was a risk he had to take.

"You are dismissed." Naruto said, and his voice sounded old. He had no business sounding that old. He was barely nineteen. Shikamaru stepped out.

"Let's go get lunch," Naruto said softly. " Where do you want to go? My treat."

"Naruto don't treat me like a child." Sasuke said.

"I'm not!" Naruto shouted turning on Sasuke. "I may be trying to protect you, and I may be selfish for that! You consider it for a second! If you had to send me on a mission with a less than fifty percentile chance of living. Or would you even give a shit!"

"That's different!"

"How so? Am I weaker? Am I dumber? Was I given the hokage position because I was a danger to myself? Was it because I needed to be taken off the battlefield?" Sasuke stared blankly, neutral, at Naruto. He knew his lover was right; there was no difference. When Sasuke never answered Naruto turned and headed to the door. "Fuck you, Sasuke! I love you so much, and what do I get it return! I don't even know why I wanted to be fucking Hokage! I do a shit job anyway! I should have taken a page out of your book and ran away." Naruto stormed to the door, going to pull it open until Sasuke slammed it closed. His hand on the door.

"Don't go." Sasuke murmured. "I haven't had my say yet." Naruto shivered when Sasuke's breath ghosted across his neck. "I do love you Naruto, and I realize I have a funny way of showing. I ran away once to avoid my feelings for a certain loud teammate of mine. I think I'm old enough to face it now. I've made mistakes, and I still do. We are not adults Naruto, we might as well be children. I am sorry I misjudged the situation, but even though that is true. You still have a job to do, and even if I end up dying, which won't happen, then you will have done your job; I'll be very proud."

"Come over tonight... please, I know you may think I'm a slut, but I need you. I want to know you fully, just in case," Naruto choked on his words.

"I won't die, but I will come over to see you." Sasuke smiled softly.

--;--

Sasuke knocked on Naruto's front door,fiddling with his hands. He had never fiddled before, then again he had never had sex with Naruto before, or anyone else before. He was'nt even sure he knew how do it in the first place. He felt like a teenage boy on his first date, then again he was a teenage boy on his first date.

_Shut up stop thinking! That is not even going to happen tonight. Naruto's not ready! You know he's not. _

The door was jerked open. "Naruto..." he was able to inhale that one name before he was jerked inside the house.

"Sasuke!" Naruto called out, wrapping his arms around Sasuke's waist as he crumpled into Sasuke's arms. "I was almost afraid you wouldn't show."

"You seem to think that a lot lately." Sasuke said softly, feeling slightly hurt that Naruto had such a lack of trust for his lover. He deserved it I suppose, this lack of trust blooming for the five years he didn't show up for morning training. "You know I love you and I won't leave you again."

"I feel a chill coming..." Naruto whispered.

"Huh?" Sasuke said not quite hearing Naruto. Naruto simply shook his head and placed his lips over his best friend's.

"I want to feel all of you, take me."

"You aren't ready, you are trying to please me while also trying to take with you while I am gone a piece of myself."

"You are right, I want a piece here with me."

"You already have a piece."

"What piece? I want a piece I can tell was real in the morning." Sasuke refused to answer the question; he knew the answer, but that would effect his pride and he couldn't have that. It was a barb to his pride that Naruto would even ask, and he never reacted well to barbs.

"Maybe when you grow up and stop acting like a child, we can do something, otherwise I feel like a pedophile and I'm just afraid I won't be able to get it up."

"You- you-- bastard! How dare you?" Naruto screamed; grabbing the nearest vase and throwing it at Sasuke. Sasuke smirked.

"See what I mean? Childish." He said drawing out the last word of his statement to barb Naruto even more. Naruto glared across the room, his face strong and chin up. He looked almost like an extremely sparkly and bright Uchiha for a moment, but the effect was ruined by Naruto's face suddenly crumpling into one of absolute sorrow. Tears streamed out of his eyes. He fell to the ground.

"You don't unders-st-stand! Shikamaru called me and s-s-s-said that the probability of death was significantly hightened. I'm afraid to lose the one person who has ever loved me back! CAN'T YOU UNDERS-ST-STAND!!! It's not that I'm being childish and saying that I don't want to move on. It's that if you didn't come back, I couldn't move on! I want something to know that I had someone in this world who would do anything for me, someone who cared for me, and someone I would die for! Can't you understand that concept? Did you ever wish you could have something to prove Itachi had cared for you. Or your father or mother!"

"I do understand, I understand that tomorrow you could wake up and never see me again. I understand that very well, but it won't happen. You are not ready for sex."

"How would you know?" Naruto shouted prepared to go on a rant.

"I am not ready! I have been the one to initiate all initial contact in this relationship. If I am not ready then you can't possibly be. Now stop fighting me, I don't want your last memory before I leave to be of us fighting."

"You are right." Naruto finally conceded, "but will you at least stay the night with me, hold me tonight, can you do that for me?"

--;--

Later on, they laid in bed together. Entwined together, Naruto whispered sleepily into his lover's bare collar bone.

"Sasuke you said I already had a piece of you, what piece did you mean." Everything was silent, but he knew Sasuke was awake by the shifting of a pale bare leg against his own.

Sasuke whispered something softly, and drifted off to sleep.

Naruto heard it loud and clear and smiled at the sappiness and un-Sasuke-ness of his reply.

_"I gave my soul away to you long before I left the first time."_

--;--

Naruto woke to the sound of Sasuke moving around. He didn't move, goodbye's were easier if one party didn't witness them. So he pretended to sleep. He felt Sasuke lean down and kiss his forehead softly, whispering in his ear-- "If I do die, please move on, but don't love them like you loved me." He almost begged. "I am so jealous, selfish, and childish, but I want it that way." Sasuke pulled back to see Naruto's eyes open and staring sorrowfully. Those ebon eyes that haunted Naruto stared into him and pulled out a piece of him. He finally understood what it meant to give your soul away.

"Did you hear?"

"Yes..."

"Don't forget about me." Sasuke whispered and kissed the side of Naruto's neck. Naruto bit into Sasuke's neck... Sasuke could feel chakra infuse into the mark Orochimaru had had on his neck until it came out looking like the Uzumaki spiral.

"Don't forget about me either." Sasuke nodded biting into Naruto's neck to leave his own mark. He didn't know how to do what Naruto did so he just mouthed the boy's neck. "Kyuubi will heal it, just infuse the bite with chakra, but not malice. Like almost healing chakra." Sasuke did as instructed, and allowed his teeth to leave the three diamond shaped marks on Naruto's neck.

"I love you, don't forget it."

"I love you too, bye;" and with that Sasuke disappeared much like Kakashi used to do and he cried- he cried for the rest of the day, he called Sakura to ask her to cover for him for two days. She sent Kakashi to Naruto; and when Naruto asked him to keep an eye on Sasuke. Kakashi said:

"With all due respect he is a soldier."

"Well, with all due respect, to you he may be a soldier, but he is my lover."

He didn't see Sasuke after that morning. He figured he must have left to get things in order. He wasn't in his office so he missed any chance he had to see Sasuke before he left. Because well, Sasuke already owned his soul and took it with him. He owned his love, that he could never give to no one else. Did he really need his dignity and to rip his heart out of his chest while all of Konoha watched.

He lay in bed and wondered if he would ever see Sasuke again. "I'm a coward." _I always fear for him before me. Such a coward._

_A/N:_ Okay that is this chapter. Oh and if you wonder why Naruto thinks he is a coward because he puts Sasuke first. It is because he loves Sasuke so much that to lose him would do him more damage, so he would rather die than see Sasuke injured. It is a strange concept, but in some countries putting a loved one before yourself is concidered to be coward-like. I do believe it is opposite in American tradition, but I wouldn't know that though. My sister, Selena, tried to explain it to me. It didn't work!


	4. I Still Miss You

I Still Trust You

Chapter Four: I Still Miss You

A/N: Hello, dear readers! Once again I would like to remind you that this story is for the lovely reviewer, fiveshadesoforange, who has lent me lots of support, and also asked for a Sasunaru with Naruto Hokage and ANBU Sasuke! I clearly tried to oblige! This is for you fiveshadesoforange... that is really long to type how about fiveshades... for just now... oh well, I will forget anyway! THANK YOU FIVESHADESOFORANGE!!!!!!!!!!! AND EVERY OTHER REVIEWER AND READER!!! This chapter was conjured by way to much Midol (It has caffiene!!!!) and Everlong by the Foo Fighters! My daddy had to work today it was lonely, with my crazy (but loveable) Grandmother with her weird "Russian-esque" accent... you should hear it!

Warning: Dirty dreams on Sasuke's part and rambling on my part... really it is bad... I tend to henge on annoying when I am hyper, and to escape my rambling just skip the parentheses.

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Sasuke sat in his metaphorical cold pit of self-pity. He really wished he had Naruto by his side. He was used to being by Naruto's side constantly, even when Naruto still took missions as a Jounin and an ANBU, Sasuke was always on his team. They had great chemistry, everyone in the village knew it. Even those less obliging to that fact. Even though their romance was just officially started, Sasuke found himself missing Naruto terribly in that sense. He was used to, now, being able to just reach over and tug Naruto into his arms. It was bothersome to reach over and get Neji instead. Not that he had, yet. He bet if he went home and told Naruto that he would laugh. He could feel a small smile creep up onto his face, and was glad the mandatory ANBU mask was there to hide it from sight. He did not need to hear Kakashi mock scolding him for having 'decently improper thoughts about his student', and then trying to slip lube and 'highly informational books', as Kakashi called them, or as Sasuke called them 'porn', into his bag. (That is a little confusing if you couldn't catch it, Kakashi is pretending to scold Sasuke for having dirty thoughts about Naruto-kun and then trying to slip lube and porn into his bag... hope that cleared that up.)

"Okay, were stopping here for the night." Kakashi called.

"Excuse me captain, but couldn't we go a bit farther." Neji questioned, while Sauske glared at his back. He couldn't stand that ass. He tried to take Naruto from Sasuke on several occasions, he flirted with Naruto blantantly when he was called into Naruto's office, and he was just all around clingy when it came to Naruto. It was tottering on the edge of unforgivable in Sasuke's little Naruto obsessed world. (I mean the man owned pictures that he hid under his bed since he was seven. Talk about stalker genes, I think it runs in the Uchiha bloodline- leads to them being good ninja's.) Sasuke hoped Naruto was okay, he left him in a bad state.

"Sasuke!" Kakashi called and motioned for the boy. Sasuke reluctantly approached his former sensei.

"Yes, captain." Sasuke stated, more than asked.

"You seem preoccupied. Is something wrong?"

"No, captain." Sasuke answered.

"Ah, it's Naruto-kun is it, let me guess, he begged you to take him, and you didn't want to under the circumstances." Sasuke was not shocked, he was not suprised, that would be un-Uchiha-esqe, and not to mention bad for his image. To display this control over his emotions he remained silent.

"How did you know!" Sasuke shrieked, guess that's why his daddy didn't love him. (It's true.)

"I'm me, you think I don't have gorgeous women and men falling at my feet begging me to pound them everytime I have a life-threatening mission." Kakashi said plainly.

"You followed me to Naruto's, didn't you?" Sasuke asked with a flat tone.

"Yep." Kakashi confirmed cheerily. In the background, the tent that Neji had been trying to set up fell on him for the fortieth time and the metal pole knocked him out.

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Sakura stared at a gaunt Naruto flanked by a tired looking Shikamaru. He had returned to work yesterday, and looked a mess. Sakura knew he had ample reason to look so horrid. If she had had to sentence her best friend to basically a suicide mission she would feel pretty crappy, too. At least she had the decency to cover it up with make-up though. Bringing to question, why did Sasuke go to Naruto's apartment last night and stay the night? Why had Sasuke been walking next to Naruto much closer than usual, and why would they lock the door to Naruto's office when they were alone? Sakura didn't know the answer, but he didn't do the same with Shikamaru.

Naruto on the other hand only had one thing on his mind, which was, of course, Sasuke. He could feel his bite mark still pulse with slight pain, but it was worth it to be bound to Sasuke. He missed Sasuke badly. He found that he had spent one night in Sasuke's arms and had trouble sleeping ever since, he diagnosed it as lack of Sasuke. He was pretty sure that was a plausible explination. It was also due to endless worry for his well-being. Shikamaru had informed him that something had changed and it had dropped to 43 percentile, though that group still had the highest chance of survival. Naruto sat in his hokage chair, the chair he had worked for all of his life, and, since a few hours ago, wished he had never recieved.

"Shika, why am I Hokage?" Naruto asked, and then tone made Shikamaru look up in mild surprise.

"You were the best for the job." Shikamaru answered simply. Naruto gave a dry chuckle. It lacked all the things a chuckle should have. It lacked mirth, joy, humor. Without those things, the chuckle seemed like a strange replacement for a sob.

"Sometimes I wonder why I wanted to be Hokage." Naruto whispered, slipping his face into his hands.

"Naruto you are nineteen years--"

"Eighteen, I am not nineteen for five more months." He spoke through his hands, the sound coming out muffled and frustrated.

"Eighteen then, you were given more responsibility than most grown adults cannot be trusted with. I think it was a bad idea to take the training wheels off so soon, but you are I believe the best Hokage we have had, ever. Even when considering your young age." Shikamaru said lazily.

"Thank you, Shikamaru." Naruto pulled back from his hands. Tiny little tears were built up on the edge of his eyes. Only seeming to amplify the deep blue of his eyes. Shikamaru felt sick when the thought, 'he looks even more gorgeous when he cries', crossed his mind. "It's just, I- I feel horrible that he matters to me more than any other ninja on the field. He matters to me more than you, than Kakashi, than Sakura, than everyone. He matters more to me than myself. I could die and the only thought on my mind would be him. I feel so cowardous. I love him so much, so much." A choked sob escaped his throat.

"He makes you cry. He always has made you cry. The only time you cry is when he is involved." Shikamaru said, voice rising un-characteristically. Naruto looked out of the window, taking a deep breath.

"Shikamaru, have you ever been in love? Really been in love, and had it returned? I can tell you now it is the worst feeling in the world, but I can also tell you it is the best. It is like a double-edged sword. It cuts and cuts and cuts away at you, like a razor, but all the while it is cutting, it is also healing you and making you feel just... just... wonderful." Naruto sighed, a blissful look in his eyes, and Shikamaru felt sick to know he was imagining Sasuke.

"Have you ever loved someone who didn't love you in return?" Shikamaru asked.

"Yes, I loved them for all of my life. They hit me, they beat me, they ignored me, they tried to kill me, they shunned me, and they raped me. I never had that love returned, and I never will."

"Who was it?" Shikamaru asked. Planning to go and kill them. Naruto strode across the room and opened up the shades that hid the city of Konoha from their sight. He looked out that window.

"All of them, every villager, every ninja, even you. Do you know the only one who ever looked at me like I was worth something more than temporary satiation, or a pawn in their game?" Shikamaru looked up slightly, feeling ashamed that Naruto felt that Shikamaru was included in those that had hurt him most.

"Sasuke did," Naruto said softly. "Sasuke has always been there for me. He knew the pain I was in. Did you know when he left, when he went to Orochimaru's, that he begged me to go with him? That he said the very same thing to me that you did. That all of you, all the villagers always made me cry. Sasuke may have made me cry, but he has made me smile more. There is a side of Sasuke that none of you have ever seen! I will stand by that Sasuke. I will also stand by the fact that I don't think that you are capable of loving me as you seem to think you are. Leave my office."

"Naruto-" Shikamaru interjected.

"I SAID LEAVE!" Naruto screamed, pointing to the door. Shikamaru stood and went for the door.

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Sasuke tossed in his sleep and groaned.

_Naruto's tanned skin streaching over muscles._

Sweat rolled down his face as he bucked up in his fitful sleep.

_Sasuke's pale skin drawn tight as he arches into his companions mouth. Lips slide down to his navel, invading the sensitive valley._

Pants escaped the swollen lips, abused with his own teeth.

_Hot breath ghosts over his member and a questing tongue reaches out inquisitively. _

He bolts out of bed, glancing around, and sighing. "Damnit." he whispers, he goes about fixing his problem himself.

A/N: It is written, but not exactly how I wanted it. I had hoped it would be better... sorry.


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